You, the stranger I don’t even meet. You, the person I talk to when I am just full of pain, agony or some stupid demon trying to use me for reasons I can barely see. You, simply the air coming to my ears or the feeling of peace when there is no one else in here.
I have not forgotten you my dear, I just got into something else and time goes away and I am almost, no longer here, I know this may surprise you or maybe and actually not, but is just the way it is, weird or not weird, crazy or even worst, insane, how can I tell you? Since I have no idea at all…
I have concerns now, since how can someone believe she has the right to say that the change is never good? Where is the faith, the hope and the “do not stop believing”? Where are the positive statements when everything just turned blue? Or gray? So here is my question… yes dear you may not have the answer but it is ok, the question is what the F is next? Do I simply care or have I lost the interest? Because no matter where I look I seem to be alone except for one person, the only one who has not fell down, who is still fighting, who has not given up… is him, are you? The light against the wall? The secret hidden between devil and God? The path to the happiness no one has ever taken before? Or is it the simple irony acting like she never did before?
Contrariety, my friend, coming to our sense, making I believe my mind is twisted more than it actually is…
So here I go again my dear, like a damned circle where mind takes the tour, over and over like the first time, worst even, like when you get drunk, and then drunk again, makes you feel in the prison with Mr. Alcohol… I do not want a prison either Mr. Alcohol, I just see my friends here and are making some other kind of honor, my friends my horrors, are no mistakes are no people but are just the ones that have been here, thoughts and feelings driving me sane or insane though staying where they must stay.
So here one more time it goes again… So I have visions of people in my head, moments, words, fortune, life, the good times that are to come, tears that are not made to let them go, so I should know better now that it must be a matter of days or even more.
I do not feel fear, I am not angry, neither agony is here, no misery, no pain I am just… apart… is that worst friend?
I know friend, I need to find my way home, because home is where your story begins, and I need to start over for sure, no matter how comfy was to be there when just mind was killing me to make me believe I was okay, you know I was not okay, there is no more hell because I finally could say “I am finally going away”, as for Fifi she will stay more than even okay, the hell I do not know anything but she is my best part, so if I am okay, she is even better.
I have not stopped believing friend, I found a necklace, I always find a song, he gets the feeling to make it to drive it, to take me home, I know I may not get it now, I may get rigid or flying… who cares if I am about to discover what the entire world has died to know for years and years, since centuries ago, for centuries to come, and I have it right in front of my soul, even though may cost the people wants to burn me as a witch, I will always be a witch that is just happy to be.
Here you read me again, my dear, I have not lost the way, I just was slow.
Hope to see you soon dear friend!
Coconut-skin, projecting here.